7 Presuppositions for life – Ideas worth living for

Please reflect upon this ideas. They are some of the presuppositions of NLP. It will help you navigate the world in a more realistic and gentle way.

Ideas worth living for

I invite you to discover what happens in your life if you simply act as if the following statements are true…

Presupposition 1: The map is not the territory. 

We build a “map of reality” as we grow up, with parents, peers and experiences. People respond to their ‘map of reality”, not to reality itself.

This means that each individual’s perception of an event is different.

We are all unique and experience the world in different ways.

We need to understand and accept that others will react very differently from us and we need to understand that just because we see things a certain way does not make it right or true.

Presupposition 2: We don’t know what we don’t know

People aren’t as good as they think they are at identifying the gaps in their knowledge;

But learning is stronger than knowledge.

We will never be perfectly knowledgeable, but we can always be teachable. It’s important that we all stay curious and ask questions.

Learning new things, challenging yourself, being curious and open to other people’s ideas makes life more interesting.

Presupposition 3: Everyone does their best with the tools he or she has available at that time.

Any behaviour was the best choice anyone had at the time.

With the wisdom of today, you would often want to have done something differently in the past. But that makes sense because you got that wisdom precisely by doing it.

People are not their behaviour and their worth as fellow humans is kept constant.

It is the appropriateness of the behaviour that is brought into question, not the person per se. You can change your behaviour and remain the same. Your value in this world is your uniqueness.

So, forget ideas of shame and guilt. They are not helping you to find creative solutions and will prevent you from acting properly in the present.

Everybody does their best with the tools and knowledge they has at the time.

Presupposition 4: The one with the most flexibility wins

The individual displaying the most appropriate flexibility in their behaviour will have the greatest influence on others.

If what you are doing isn’t working, do something else. 

Flexibility is the key to success. People with great flexibility are open to the unexpected wonders of life, adapt when changes call for it, accept things they cannot change, find creative solutions, and are constantly growing.

Presupposition 5: The meaning of your communication is the response you get. 

While your intention may be clear to you, it is the other person’s interpretation and response that reflects your effectiveness.

Be sure the message you send equals the message they receive. It is your responsibility to make yourself understandable.

Pressuposition 6: There is no failure, only feedback.


Have you learned something from the situation? In that case, is not failure.

All results are in reality, achievements. It is just a question of whether they are the desired outcome for that context or task, or not. 

With this understanding, we can stop blaming ourselves and others, find solutions and improve the quality of what we do.

Presupposition 7: Anything can be accomplished if the task is broken down into small enough steps. 

There is no such thing as unresourceful people, only unresourceful states. 

The resources needed by an individual to achieve their outcome, in any situation, are already inside them. Every human capacity is transferable since we are all human and therefore have broadly the same ‘hardware’.

Forget limits. If someone else can do it, I can do it too.

Achievement becomes easier if activities are manageable; One step at a time is enough. With patience and time, you can blow up limiting beliefs, fears, and constrictions.

Do you have any questions?

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Maria da Silva (PhD, DHP Acc Hyp) is a Cognitive Behavioural Hypnotherapist and a Trauma/Attachment Informed Coach, an expert in helping people understand and overcome their past conditioning and engage in meaningful and peaceful relationships through Nonviolent Communication.