Meet Maria

My name is Maria, I am Portuguese, and I am a certified Cognitive Behavioural Hypnotherapist and a Nonviolent Communication (NVC) practitioner and teacher.

Before graduating in CBH, I was a PhD Geologist, and I worked as a researcher in Earth Sciences at the University of Porto. I have two grown-up kids and I live in Stroud with my partner.

Although I really enjoyed my work and have amazing kids, I was always haunted by the spectre of depression. For more than twenty years the dark way of thinking would assault me more frequently and deeply than I would wish.

First suicide attempt at 27 … several weeks at the psychiatric hospital. My daughter was a year old. There was no talk about postpartum depression and my relationship with her father did not help. The second attempt at 41 – this time I just wanted to rest for a few days, but it went wrong, and I ended up in the hospital again.

In between, many hours, many years of suffering and despair. The idea of ​​suicide constantly surfaced, the desperation for not finding solutions, not seeing the future, and just wanting to give up. And the weight, the huge weight on top of me, pulling me down, as if I were carrying all my “stupid past” on my shoulders. Looking back and just seeing mistakes, judging myself and my circumstances always negatively. Feeling that my life is ridiculous, stupid, unnecessary, and a burden.

I believed that peace was impossible. Guilt, shame, loneliness – total loneliness in a very dark place – inside.

I thank my children and my mother for their/my existence. They, and the certainty that I would do them terrible harm, kept me here, alive. My love for them kept me afloat. My love for them gave me life – and fortunately, a life that is now full of peace and joy.

Of course, my relationships were suffering as I was suffering. The big question is “was depression affecting my relationships or was my relationship affecting my depression?”

The truth?

The domination and comparison and separation culture was making me depressed and angry and needy.

The “right and wrong culture”, the “good and bad culture” is the cause of our problems.

When finally, I decided to get real help, my life changed. The support I needed all my life was there for me. Knowledge, empathy and some simple techniques gave me the power to transform my life.

I discovered in hypnotherapy a new world … It helped me find the lasting peace that I always desired. A peace and joy I didn’t think were possible.

It was then that I embarked on a long journey of learning about trauma, relationships and the neuropsychological processes behind our behaviours and thoughts.

I wanted to give to others the same kind of support I received and help others who are dealing with the same problems I experienced. And during my training, I saw, with my own eyes, how empathy, compassion and imagination can change people’s lives for the better.

After qualifying as a Cognitive Behavioural Hypnotherapist (Hypnotic World and UKCHH) and completing a wide range of complementary training (Human Givens College and CNVC) I founded the CAER centre.

Caer Ibormeith, Celtic Goddess of Dreams and Prophecy, is a pan-Celtic goddess who was worshipped in Ireland, Scotland, and Wales. She takes the form of a swan and lives on a lake called The Dragon’s Mouth. Caer was the love interest of Aonghus, the Irish love god, who first saw her in a dream. Aonghus wanted to marry Caer, but he first had to pass one challenge – to recognise Caer, who took the form of a swam, among other identical one hundred and fifty swans. Learn Caer story here.

Then I found Nonviolent Communication. This was just the cherry on the top of the cake. I embraced it with all my being. I knew I’ve found the solution. I observer myself, my family, friends, and clients in a new way. I observed the world in a new way.

And mostly, I’ve seen couples accepting and celebrating each other, their unique needs, and ways of dealing with life. I’ve seen parents relaxing about their role as parents. I’ve seen families practicing forgiveness and compassion. I’ve seen friends sharing their differences in peace.

I have seen people leaning and applying NVC, living balanced lives, believing in themselves and their ability to solve problems and achieve their goals.

I became and my clients became OBSERVERS. Free from judgements, evaluations and demands.

There is no greater satisfaction than receiving messages from our clients, months or years later, telling how therapy has changed their lives.

Because whenever I guide someone to adopt their own healing path and transform their relationships, I am not only helping one person: I am helping their children and their grandchildren: and this spreads for generations.