How to support your men

A Brief Summary

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Knowledge is power – when you understand, accept and act in accordance with the differences between man and women, you have the power to transform your relationships.

But without a deeper understanding of our differences, it is unavoidable that we will continue to create unnecessary problems in our relationships because we misunderstand our partners.

Both, women and men want a loving lasting relationship. However, because we are different, many times we just don’t understand each other. It is not enough merely being authentic in sharing yourself: to succeed in dating you need to consider how you will be interpreted as well. The meaning of communication is the response you get.

You need to use self-control and not go for immediate gratification in your love life. Not using self-control in a romantic relationship will create a whole range of issues and problems. Firstly, you might create negative moments, fights, jealous outbursts and more where it was not needed. Secondly, you are essentially giving away your power to the other person. When you always act upon your emotions, you are showing other people how to manipulate you.

This should be though in schools, before the teenage years. Boys and girls are different and men and women are even more different. How much suffering would be prevented if we could accept an even celebrate our differences

What do man want?

a nurturing woman to make a home.

What do women want?

a strong man who would be a good provider

It looks like I am talking about the caveman, right? Well, at an emotional level we are still acting and thinking like our primitive ancestors. 

Sorry if this annoys you – you are a modern girl. You don’t believe in these stupid things. Well, if you want to insist on thinking we are all very advanced and civilized… think again. I was just like you … and didn’t work…once and again did not work. Until I decided to stop trying to teach a cat to bark.

And… Is working! Very well indeed.

And you can also argue that men need to learn about women, not only the other way around. Oh! How I agree with you! But again, fighting against reality did not resolve my problems in relationships. Most men do not want to learn about women because that would mean they are not good enough and they don’t want to accept that, not even for themselves. It’s a shame!

But I promise if you learn how to deal with the differences you are going to get what you want. Trust me.


Learn, accept and work with this – your life will change. 


The first thing to keep in mind is that men are HUNTERS and WOMEN are COLLECTORS.

  • Men need to be your superheroes. They need someone who appreciates his efforts and what he is able to provide.
  • Men need someone to share what they accomplished.
  • He needs someone who can trust him and depend on him for what he can do for you
  • Men respond to you when they are seen not as the problem but as the solution. Release your demands and clearly communicate your feelings, creating the opportunity for him to solve the problem.
  • Men do not respond to nagging, ultimatums, threats, needing, blaming, or even empty compliments.
  • Men are like rubber bands – they need to pull back and return. But they only return if you let them go and avoid going after him. When things get to close too quickly they need to pull back. By creating more distance between you, he has the chance to experience how much he loves you. But if you run after him he will conclude you are not the right person for him.
  • Men want to make women happy. But they need to have clear instructions on how to please you.
  • Men crave appreciation, acceptance and admiration for what he achieved or plans to achieve.
  • Men long for being accepted for what they are and to be forgiven when they misunderstood a woman.
  • A men feels how much he loves a woman when he is directly faced with the possibility of losing her. Thus, he needs to know how much you love him but at the same time be sure you have a good life whether he is with you or not. He needs to know you are a high value woman, with your own life and interests.  You don’t have to reject a man to create the distance for him to fall in love with you. You just need to have your own life and enjoy it.
  • Men love to solve problems. They do not need help. They do no want advise. They want to solve the problem by themselves and be appreciated for it. Never offer help to a man. He will ask if he needs it. Ask a man to help you – he will feel complimented. He wants to feel competent.
  • Men do not feel threatened by high performance women. You can earn much more than him or be in a higher position than him. What men don’t like are women that say or show they don’t need them. You can have a fulfilled life outside your relationship but your man needs to know he is your emotional support and he is an important part of your life.
  • Men need to know that what he has to offer is enough to make you happy.


He feels appreciated when you say:

That’s a good idea. That’s really helpful ….”

That’s very interesting! That makes it easier for me…. Thanks

That’s a great point. It really helps me to see things differently…

That sure makes sense. I am glad I talked to you. That helped to…

Thank you for making me happy!

My life is much better when I am with you

I trust you have the potential to make me happy

I need your help to ….

Thank you for fixing it… I couldn’t do it without you.

I am feeling much better since I met you

This is a lovely restaurant…

My life is good with you

I feel safe with you

………. you get it. USE THEM


Do you want learn more? Click here

Would you like to transform your relationships?


Maria da Silva (PhD, DHP Acc Hyp) is a Cognitive Behavioural Hypnotherapist and a Trauma/Attachment Informed Coach, an expert in helping people understand and overcome their past conditioning and engage in meaningful and peaceful relationships through Nonviolent Communication.